Authentic, Open, Fun: Loren on the Craft of Intimacy Coordination

Authentic, Open, Fun: Loren Loubser on the Craft of Intimacy Coordination

On South African film sets, the presence of an intimacy coordinator is still relatively new. The role is often misunderstood—sometimes seen as a box-ticking exercise, sometimes feared as an intrusion into the director's vision. Loren pushes back against that. An actor, writer, and director themself, they approach intimacy work with the same creative spirit they bring to performance: collaborative, playful, and deeply attuned to bodies and context.

Speaking between shoots in Cape Town, Loren describes their style as "authentic, open, fun"—a mantra that carries through their work with actors, directors, and camera teams alike. Here, they talk about what drives their practice, the challenges of working in a conservative industry, and the importance of respect in reshaping how intimacy is understood on screen.

Mpolokeng: How did you first find your way into intimacy coordination?

Loren: I came into it through acting. Over time I started working as a writer and director as well, and that broadened how I see performance. Intimacy work became this natural extension—it's about protecting performers but also serving story.

Mpolokeng: How would you describe your style?

Loren: Authentic, open, fun. Those three words feel right. I'm very sex positive in my approach, because of my background in theatre, in sex work, and in the kink scene. I like encouraging performers to play, to find things in themselves as characters.

Mpolokeng: What does that look like in practice, on set?

Loren: It means recognising that not everything works for everybody. You can plan a scene, but then you put two bodies together and it's clear—it doesn't work with these bodies. So I adapt. Culturally we're different, racially we're different, beliefs are different, and all of that sits in the body. I try to keep that in mind when choreographing.

Mpolokeng: South Africa is still fairly conservative. How does that show up in your work?

Loren: I sometimes forget! I wish everyone was open. But you feel hesitation—it's not always about someone's own comfort, but about what they've learned is "right" or "not okay." That definitely shapes what's possible and how I frame things.

Mpolokeng: What kinds of scenes do you find most rewarding?

Loren: The challenging ones. Like, I did a shower scene recently—at first I was like, this is going to be a nightmare. But then it turned out beautifully, soft and intimate. Those moments remind me that pushing through what seems impossible can lead to something really special.

Mpolokeng: There's a perception that intimacy coordinators "take over" from directors. How do you respond?

Loren: It's not our show. We collaborate. We elevate the vision. I always try to bring in the director's dream scenario, then layer in the actors' needs, then work with camera to make sure it's achievable. All departments are collaborative—the art department comes with options, and so do we.

Mpolokeng: Who has supported or influenced you in this work?

Loren:  Kate [Lush]. She's an intimacy coordinator and an actor. On one of my first really tough jobs, she was there, and honestly if it wasn't for her, I would've quit. She had my back in a way that made me see this work as something I could do, and something that mattered.

Mpolokeng: What do you hope your legacy will be?

Loren: Respect. A shift in how the industry understands intimacy—not as an afterthought, but as craft. I'd love coordinators to be called in early, like stunt teams are, and treated as part of the creative process rather than compliance officers.

Mpolokeng: And outside of set—does your work affect the way you watch or experience intimacy

Loren: Definitely. I practise choreography with partners sometimes, check angles with a phone. I can't switch it off. It's like how a writer can't just watch a film—they're always analysing. That's me now, thinking about garments, positions, how it would look on camera.

Mpolokeng: So you'd still say "authentic, open, fun" is your mantra?

Loren: Yes. Authentic because it has to feel true, open because every actor is different, and fun because otherwise it's just heavy. Intimacy should have joy in it, even when the subject matter is dark.

Interviewed in September 2025 by Mpolokeng Chabane